The River Trip

Under normal circumstances this would have been a pleasant trip, he thought to himself as the water slapped at the sides of his canoe. His paddle stroked in a hypnotic rhythm as he searched the river banks for any unforeseen dangers. He had heard of survey parties going completely missing in these parts and he didn't want to travel down those paths.

In reaching down into his canoe to grab his canteen he heard a noise pass quickly by his head. Thinking it was only one of the countless insects to inhabit these streams he went about his business. The sudden appearance of a 5 inch dart in the side of his canteen readjusted his thinking. All of a sudden the river was filled with the sound of many whistling darts.

Quickly he laid down on his back in the canoe. Luckily it allowed him complete cover from the darts flying overhead. The canoe was solid and rejected all the incoming projectiles. He could only hope his attackers would not find any higher advantage point and shoot down upon him. Thankfully the river current was strong enough at this point of the river to continue his journey without him needing to paddle, only he sure did wish to see where he was headed.

Then just as soon as the river bank had exploded with excitement, it stopped.

After some time he chanced taking a look and slowly lifted his head up to peer back from whence he came. He could make out in the shadows some forms but nothing too substantial. Breathing a sigh of relief he eased himself into his original position only to stare straight ahead at what could only be described as an "oh crap" moment. The river had decided to forsake its nice casual pace for some incredibly torrential set of rapids. Why didn't I charter a helicopter he asked himself as the river began its quickening pace.

The river was nasty. Large jagged rocks protruded out from their watery confines. The speed for which he was carried down the river was ever increasing, testing his skills behind the paddle. Water crashed into his canoe drenching his equipment and then himself. The grinding of metal against the cold rocks sent chills up his spine. His muscles ached against the continuous pounding. Over and over again he narrowly missed disaster and almost certain death. Up ahead he could sense there was a calm portion of the river, if he could only hang on till then. This brief moment of jubilation was quickly shattered by the reality of the situation. Again the water crashed into him. Again he missed the rocks by mere inches.

Scanning ahead he noticed the river was getting much too narrow for his liking. A thunderous pounding was slowly becoming more apparent and he realized that this was another one of those "oh crap" moments except with a few more colourful adjective added.

Directly ahead lay a 60 foot waterfall that spilled onto a neatly placed outcropping of very big sharp rocks. Seizing the moment and with as much energy as he could muster at this point he headed towards the shoreline. That's when he saw them for the first time. That's when he saw them clearly.

His dart wielding friends had decided to show up for a show. Obviously they had been tracking him as he made his way through the rapids. Waiting to see if he would make his way to the shore and relative safety. But they didn't shoot any darts this time. As his eyes locked to theirs he noticed they were smiling. Not one of those happy smiles but one of pure evil.

Seizing the moment he quickly adjusted his canoe and directed it straight for the waterfall edge. Better to have the rocks beat me to death then end up as some buffet main course he thought to himself. With his speed gathering he neared the edge quickly. Then he saw it!

A large tree had fallen by the river bank just below the waterfall's edge. It's branches had been either sheared off by the cliff edge or by the constant pounding of the water. If he could skillfully maneuver the canoe to go over the edge and land on the trunk he could possibly slide down the tree, over the wet moss and continue on below, narrowly missing the rocks in a superhuman trick of fate.

Not the best of plans but considering he had but mere micro-seconds to think this up and execute it, he was doing fine. It was a million to one shot but it was a lot better then face-planting on some rocks.

The canoe reached the edge of the waterfall, he adjusted his strokes, the tip thrusting outward away from the edge and then down as gravity took hold. With his last bit of strength he pushed on the paddle to land on the tree trunk. The water was now pushing him down at an accelerated speed. With a thud he landed hard on the trunk only to bounce off again with the pressure of the water propelling him quickly downward. A cascading shower of water completely covered him as the back of the canoe bounced onto the tree. Blinded by the shear volume of water he was in for one hell of a ride. The front of the canoe once again pounded on the trunk as he emerged from the flow of water. Sliding down the tree thanks to the build up that moss and slime, he quickly gained even more speed. Then in what could only be described as an incredible amount of good fortune, he skipped off the tree and bounced onto the water below, missing the sharp deadly rocks by fraction of inches.

Looking back he saw his evil grinning friends on the cliff top. Feeling his ego a little inflated he gave them a nice wave and big grin. He only hoped the rest of his voyage wouldn't be as eventful as his first day.